Thursday, June 2, 2011

Bring It, Freak

So this post is really supposed to be a Snickers and Smiles post. But, you know, a multi-purpose post is always a good thing, right? So it's going out into the blogosphere with The Freak Next Door in mind as well.

I just find it
sadistic, sick, and twistedfunny that after about 4 or 5 months of  absolute silence from The Freak, that last week his ugliness reared its head once again in the way of loud music that seemed to emanate from the bowels of hell itself. I mean, yes, it was THAT loud. And why, pray tell, did he decide to try to blast our sanity from our bodies using every stereo and speaker at his disposal? Um, because the Hubs needed to haul stone into our front porch, which is being rebuilt.

Yes. The stone-hauling was, apparently, a nuisance to The Freak. You know...bothersome. Annoying. And I'm guessing, too loud. So, yeah, the obvious course of action would be to blast your freak music so loud that even the dead dog buried two feet below the surface  in my back yard could hear it. Absolutely logical, right? [Insert my internal snicker here.]

And of course my first impulse was to turn to The Freak and call him a...

FRIENDS Mother Fuuuu Reaction gif

But then I heard my mother's voice in my head saying, Christina (because I'm only Christina when I'm a very bad girl), that's not very ladylike. And really, she's right. Mom's have such an annoying way of always being right.

So after I thought on it for a bit, I decided that I am indeed a lady, and as such, manners are always important. So if I'm going to say anything to The Freak, there can be no name-calling.  That won't solve anything. I should just approach him politely and remember to work in a "please," even if he's spewing his venom all over me. And perhaps that would go something like this...

Shut the Fuck Up Gif

Hmm...that seemed like a much better idea in my head. But being that I know from experience it's pointless to say anything to The Freak, I thought better of it and decided to just ignore him instead. Rise above it, as they say. Be the better person. Something he could never do.

And then as I was thinking about writing this post today, I stumbled across something on the Web that was so perfect...it absolutely made me smile. So I dedicate it to everyone else in the world who is dealing with their own freak next door.

Ugly Heart Gif

He thinks he can win this? I think not.

Bring it, Freak.